Silent Whispers…

There’s a beautifully written post by Michelle over at the “Say What Club” blog – entitled: “All That A Whisper Is“.  Michelle is a mom who has severe hearing loss herself, and talks about how she could not hear whispers from her child.  Please go read her post…  it’s an inspiring read.

For me, it also gave me a glimpse to the other side.  Because along with not hearing the “th, f, s, sh, sp, t, b, etc” silent consonants, it was my son who could not hear my whispers.  I wrote this in response to her post:

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great post… thank you for sharing that.

It reminded me that when I realized my son couldn’t hear whispers (he was 4 when we found out he had a mild-mod hearing loss)… and it suddenly made sense why when HE whispered something to me, he only moved his lips. He didn’t think you were SUPPOSE to say it out loud.. because, he could not hear us.

When I first realized that… I felt tremendously guilty… both, for not realizing why he only moved his lips… and, because I realized that for 4 years… I was always whispering sweet nothings in his ears… I love you’s… sssshhhhhh sounds when he was crying… and he never heard any of it…

I felt terrible about that… but,

His speech is a little off…

AC-prek2000

Below is a letter I sent to a friend back in January 2001 – just after we had taken AC to his 4 yr check up, and at the advice of his Pre-K teacher, I mentioned that she thought his “speech was a little off”. 

This captures the mood… and thoughts of that moment…

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Date: 18 January 2001

Hey _____,

I’m feeling a little scared..

I just had my son to the doctors office for his 4 year check up. AC is very healthy – but, I mentioned to her how his preschool teacher commented that his speech was a little difficult to understand sometimes. I knew this, but thought it was normal for his age. But, his doctor said his pronunciation is a little “lazy” for his age… and then we started questioning his hearing because he wouldn’t do the headphone hearing test earlier on in the visit. We tried to get him to do it again – and he either wasn’t hearing very well, didn’t understand what he was suppose to do, or he just didn’t want to do it.

So, his doc suggested I take him for a better evaluation to a hearing and speech center. I already made the appointment for 2/1.  I never noticed or thought he had a hearing problem, but now I’m worried.

I was trying to test him myself today, and it did seem he had difficulty hearing me when I whispered or spoke in lower tones. It’s so hard to tell… and if he does have a problem, I can’t believe I didn’t notice before.  

Starting an ASL class tomorrow

I can’t wait!

It’s just an introductory course… but, still… it will be fun. 

I hope I can do it!

Next year, AC will take ASL as his language in 7th grade.  We have both been wanting to learn it for a while.  He’s hoping I can teach him a few things so he can get a head start. 

One of my hopes is that if we learn ASL, it will open more doors and opportunities for AC in social situations, etc.  We haven’t been able to find any other Hard of Hearing kids that AC can really relate to, but we live in one of the largest (if not THE largest) Deaf populations around.  It was explained to me that being HOH – is sort of like being born to a bi-cultural family.  It’s in the child’s interest to learn a bit of “bothe worlds”.  In order for us to do that, I think we need to embrace ASL as well. 

Here is a good article about that: “a dual identity for hard of hearing students; good for the world, good for the. deaf community, critical for students.” By Donald A. Grushkin

Deb

Bus Stop Blues…

My son’s bus came whizzing up our street, and instead of slowing and stopping at the corner, he just barely slowed down and turned.  I stood watching from my driveway, wondering  – “what the ??  Where is my son?”. 

 So, I thought, “ok.  no need to panic.  He’s probably fine.  Maybe, he missed the bus… maybe he needed to stay after to get a book?”.   Still, the overly-motherly-worrisome voice in the back of my head couldn’t help throwing in it’s 2 cents – “Maybe he was kidnapped by aliens and being held hostage against his will?!?!”.  I shook any “what-if-terrible-scenarios” out of my head and  reverted back to the calm rationalle mom that I am…  “No… no.. I’m sure it’s one of the first things”,  I thought. 

So, I called the school.   The school called the bus.  The bus driver reports back to the school, who reports back to me, that my son IS on the bus. 

That’s not a Bluetooth headset! (Jerks steal HA)

Heard this in the news recently… about a kid who had his hearing aid ripped right off his head!  I was so appalled…. I had to share and vent.  I mean?  What the &@^%&?  I can’t hardly believe it – but, then agan, yes, I can.  Still, what a world we live in!  Read on:

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from: http://www.latimes.com/technology/la-me-speech14-2008jul14,1,5365903.story

That’s not a Bluetooth headset

Thieves, perhaps after cellphone gear, have twice stolen a deaf boy’s special earpiece.
By Mary Engel, Los Angeles Times Staff Writer
July 14, 2008
The first time someone snatched the speech processor from behind her son’s ear, Hilda Giron got it back. She had been shopping for groceries and shouted to the cashier

Acknowledging the needs of children with mild hearing loss…

I was surfing, and found a post about a recent study and article, called: “Effect of Minimal Hearing Loss on Children’s Ability to Multitask in Quiet and in Noise“.  The full text in a PDF format, and more info can be found here: http://lshss.asha.org/cgi/content/abstract/39/3/342. 
The abstract reads:

Effect of Minimal Hearing Loss on Children’s Ability to Multitask in Quiet and in Noise
  – Brittany McFadden, Andrea Pittman, Arizona State University, Tempe

Purpose: The purpose of the present study was to examine the effect of minimal hearing loss (HL) on children’s ability to perform simultaneous tasks in quiet and in noise.
Method: Ten children with minimal HL and 11 children with normal hearing (NH) participated. Both groups ranged in age from 8 to 12 years. The children categorized common words (primary task) while completing dot-to-dot games (secondary task) in quiet as well as in noise presented at 0 dB and +6 dB signal-to-noise ratios (SNRs). It was hypothesized that the children’s progression through the dot-to-dot games would slow as they encountered more difficult listening environments. This hypothesis was based on the theory that listeners have limited cognitive resources to allocate to any combination of tasks.
Results: The dot rate of both groups decreased similarly in the multitasking conditions relative to baseline. However, no other differences between groups or listening conditions were revealed. Significantly poorer word categorization was observed for the children with minimal HL in noise.
Conclusion: These data suggest that children with minimal HL may be unable to respond to a difficult listening task by drawing resources from other tasks to compensate.

I found this article very interesting… a little discouraging… but, mostly I am glad that this is being researched and that the needs of children with mild hearing loss is being acknowledged. >

“The kid with the hearing aids”…

AC is way more than “the kid with the hearing aids”…  but, labels come cheap and everyone uses them.  
 

Below is another letter I had written 9 days after our son (then almost 4 yrs old)  was diagnosed… while we waited on getting his new hearing aids.  Reality hits home about labeling… stigma… hearing aids.  Things that still bother me 7 years later…  

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Written: February 10, 2001

Hi ___ =),

I need to vent a little more about AC… Something hit me like a ton of bricks last night… and I can’t quite shake it now….

We were over a LE’s house… sitting around the table, while our kids were sitting in the playroom… and from where I was sitting, I could see my son sitting in a chair, just watching the TV… and I was looking at him and thinking about how cute he is with his new haircut and all… what a great kid… you know… those loving motherly feelings…

Then I was thinking that soon, he’ll have his hearing aids… and I was just imagining him with them on… I’m actually looking forward to his reaction to them… and being able to hear everything… I’m thankful we now know and can deal with this.

But, then something just hit me… and I thought “Oh my God…. pretty soon, when people look at him… like I’m just watching him now… not me, but strangers or MOST people… the thing they are going to notice is going to be those hearing aids in his ears… ya know? and, I was just >

Apparently, he has “permanent hearing loss” in both ears…

Below is an email I wrote from Feb, 2001 – when my son was first diagnosed with having a hearing loss. He had just turned 4.

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Written: February 1, 2001

 Hi …

Well, I took AC this morning for a thorough hearing evaluation, at the advice of his Doc. As you know, we were a little worried since his pre-K teacher mentiooned that his speech is not quite up to par, and since he wouldn’t/couldn’t do the hearing test at his 4 year check up. Up until that point, it never really dawned on me that his hearing might not be normal. But, these last couple of weeks – all kinds of little things starting clicking and making sense. So, when he had his evaluation this morning, I was sorry to hear that they do show hearing loss, but, I wasn’t too surprised.

Apparently, he has “permanent hearing loss” in both ears. That was sort of hard to take. I was hoping it was fluid or something.. anything that could be “fixed”. Still…

Hello world!

Just getting this up and running… so excuse the lack of info… and stop back soon. I hope to make this a place where myself and others can vent and share experiences…  as welll as share resources for parents/kids with hearing loss.

If you have any ideas of links that I should add – please let me know… or just say “hi” if you drop by.

Thanks!
Deb